My Family....

So, its been a long tedious trip. All along I have been so focused on getting better and making sure I still did what I needed to do, for me, the kids, Greg and as much as I could in general!! Never really realized the impact certain things would have on my kids!!!! I get it - I have just about zero energy and I'm not the same but how does one handle hair loss - on a child's level??? My son had a project in the beginning of the school year - family, nationality and religion. He had to get pictures of all those things, one picture included Mom with hair. He got this project back yesterday and all the emotions came pouring out!!!! I tried to be strong and make him (and her) understand that its only temporary and it will be ok!! Knowing in my heart, it will be ok but how do you convince your 10 and 12 year old children this. Since they were born, its been the three of us, going here and there, doing this and that!! I've tried the best I could to make them independent and I think I've done a decent job. But I can't imagine how they feel looking at mom with no hair and not because its "in" but because she's sick!!! So, my heart breaks just a little bit when I can't fix what hurts!!!!!!!
So, that was yesterday afternoon....yesterday morning is another story!!! I get a call from the school psychologist at Sammy's school, apparently her teacher brought her there last week to "talk"!!
I, of course, had no idea...I was relaxing with my husband in Wildwood!!!! So, Sammy is concerned with all that I am going through and thinks that when I went for the transfusion that I was having more tests done and I'm sicker now than when I started!!!!! Sometimes I wish I could take them with me to see what goes on and have them realize - its not all that bad!!!!! Again, the explanation was, the doctors are giving me things to make me better but the chemo is what is killing the cancer and that's what is good!!!! So, all these little bad things that I am going through are going to, in the long run make me all better!!!!! RIGHT!!!!
I swear - you know that book, "What to Expect when your Expecting" - well - wheres the book - what to tell your kids when you have cancer!!!!! I read that expecting book like it was the bible - front to back - with BOTH pregnancies, I have no guidelines now, I'm kinda going at it with the truth - God - I hope that's the right decision cuz I really don't know how else to approach it!!!!
Thanks for reading - and letting me get this off my chest!!! Such therapy - for me anyway :)